Stories Shared: Risk of Self Exposure

Category: Stories

One spends much of a lifetime (inner-energy) Seeking & Searching-Love & Loving & Being Loved.  Desires rooted in the ‘Need’ to Be-Known & Seen & Rewarded & Remembered.

Our inner need, a worthy pursuit.  Yet, most ‘Hide’ behind a Mask.  Mask build upon;

Past-Conditioning/Collective Thought/Established Order & Norms/Collective Belief Systems/Obeying Rules & Norms & Laws & Codes without personal Investigation/Possibly, in contrast to our individual sense of ‘Right & Wrong’ & Rejecting Inner-Truths.   Masks which have been Manufactured/Programmed into our Subconscious. Guided by our Programming & Expectations & Obligations.  Living Life on auto-piolet & doing things without Inner-Awareness & not Mindfully.

Living a Life filled with much ‘Business’.

Earning our ‘Rest’ & ‘Relaxation’ as a Commodity.

Trusting, one-day;

Looping into the on-going Loop of Reward & Punishment Systems (External & Internal).

__

Friends,

Let’s investigate & explore; Intentions of wishing to be Seen/Noticed & Heard & Loved/Liked.  Who is One wishing the Other ‘Knows’?

If,  One stays in relations & situations & circumstances which do not ‘Align’ with One’s Authentic Self!?

One vests much of ‘energy’  perpetuating the Thoughts & Beliefs Learned/Taught by ‘Others’ & intent on Proving they are ‘Right’!?

Feeling Discontent & Dislike/Hate towards ‘Other’s’!?

Judging All Things that Do Not support One’s Thought & Beliefs/Expecting & Pressuring & Excluding those who may not ‘fit’ into the Organized Order of Things (as One was Taught)!?

Doing Things out of Obligations & Expectations!?

Certainly, The Self One often ‘presents’ is Not The-Self/Parts of Self/The Inner-Self/The Unique & Individual Beauty of Self!?

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I invite You,  Investigate & Explore-Your “Masks”.

 In truth, I spent a life-time; playing roles/projecting self as ‘perfectly’ as I possible/playing and replaying all interactions with other(s)/assessing and criticizing my ‘performance’  & ‘expecting’ More & Better (Earning my Rest & Worth).

(Q)  ‘Who’ is the One that Other’s Know & See & Hear!?

Does One ‘Strive’ to be Known & Seen & Heard as The Projections/An Illusionary Projection of Self!? Projection of Self, One Believes to be Worthy of ‘Being’ Known & Seen & Heard!?

Merely, An Avatar of Self!?  Façade!?  Display of the ‘Safe’ parts of Oneself!?  Projection of what One ‘Believes’ to Be-Worthy & Loving-Parts that would maximize One’s ‘Connections’!? Projection of The Aspects ‘Deemed’ Worthy by Another!? Perhaps, glimpses into One’s Desires & Potential State of Being!?

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I am suggesting, our inner longing is ‘Deeper’ & Authentic!

(Q) What’s holding One from Residing IN Authenticity—Down!?

Certainly, all things/everything One was Taught as ‘Truths’. Perpetuated through ‘history’ both collective & individual that Life/Living/World is rooted in Survival.  Messages & Systems Systematically Building/Reinforcing states of Competition/Lack of Personal Worth & Need to Earn One’s Needs to be met/Perpetuating Belief Systems rooted in ‘Judgements’ & Punishments (Education/Employment/Affiliations/Communities/ Religions) and System that views Winners & Losers/Smart & Stupid/Beautiful & Ugly/ Worthy & Unworthy.

Much like many, early on, I learned & incorporated into my own belief system/survival mode;

No One Cares & No One Hears!

No One Helps!

One’s Goal=Survival!

Emotions=Weakness!

Supress Emotions/ Reject Intuition/Pretend-All is Good (Clarity, Other’s may ask ‘How are You?’ but all they wish to hear-I Am Good!

Understanding, if Other’s ‘Know’ One’s Truths/Painful Experiences & Traumas,

One will be perceived as being Weak/Judged on Trauma Responses/Victimized/Hurt & Harmed/Used & Used-Up…

You & I have Experienced & Witness The Risks One Must Accept in their ‘Intentions’ to Discard-The Masks of One’s Learning & Beliefs & Projections.

(Q) Inherent Risks IN Living IN-Truth of Self ?

(Q) Consequences/Supportive or devastating to Self?   Or, Is it worth the efforts in relationship to the tradeoff -The weight One Carries!?

The heaviness of weight & pressures & obligations & expectations; stored within One’s Mind (Think on another time) and Body (Tension Headaches & Neck/back/body physical tension & pain/Dis-ease!?

Personally, knowing intimately ‘tension’ and chronic pain and Disease (Stomach).  Lifetime spent; Ignoring Body’s Messages & NOT respecting my own intuition & believing in Obligations & Expectations & Playing ‘My’ Part.  Lets say, clearly, I am a slow learner & the  severity of my experiences had to escalate for me to take notice! Lifetime in Quest/Search for Salvation & Saviour to come along & Save Me from My Own Suffering!  Yet, the question remains, even if such a thing existed as a Saviour & Salvations, Whom would they be Saving (The Projected Self)!?

(Q) The Choice One Chooses on the Spectrum of Suffering!?

The suffering rooted in not being Seen/Heard OR

The Inner-Suffering of Investigation/Unlearning & Learning New Thoughts & Establishing New Beliefs & Being An Authentic Self!?

I do ‘Hear’ your Screaming Fears ***Safety & Security & Survival.

I get it, important aspects; spent a lifetime ‘Stuck’ within My Survival Skills.

Now, I ‘Feel’ those from my past-Do Not Know Me/Aware, I didn’t give them an opportunity.

How could they know Me/My Inner-Being if I never shared those aspects of My Soulful Self?

Worse, I Did Not ‘Know’ Myself!

Acceptance of One’s Past presents Opportunities to Investigate & Feel & Choose One’s Path-Forward.

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Friends,

You get to ‘Choose’ Your Own Path.

I get to choose my path & perhaps;

Together, we may;

ReDefine Words/Systems & ReLearn.

Re-establish New Thoughts & Beliefs & Affect & Effect Emotions and Actions (by extension).

Create—Grow-In a Supportive & Nurturing Environment.

____

Today’s Challenge:

Do ‘Take’  a Risks.

I Desire to Know & See & Hear YOU!

Risks are ‘Risks’ irrelevant of the Value One may assign, so start small.  Lol

Go Beyond your comfort & safe boundaries;

Do something you’re being called to do/sing, dance, tell someone something nice, listen to a different perspective (thought or belief) without responding/Take Time-Out for Yourself/Eat something mindfully…Be Creative & Choose!

Reflect on Feelings You Feel & Other’s Feelings (if applicable).

Allow me to suggest;

The more energy one places on The Self Presented as a Projection=Thoughts & Behaviours are played on auto-pilot & One gets further from Oneself/The Authentic Being Hiding under the Layers of Beliefs (rooted in past learning & survival skills) & FEAR.

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